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| Art by Jack A. Warren |
So, first and foremost, what are Monsquitoes.
Well Monsquitoes are mosquitoes that are the size of buzzards, travel in swarms in the hundreds of thousands, and have suckers that can go through just about anything, from the toughest varmint's hide, to even diamond, that is of course, if it means they get to suck some blood.
Now the extra special bad thing about the Monsquitoes, is unlike other critters of the natural world, who are created by divine power and work in harmony with each other, the Monsquitoes were formed from some bad medicine by man's hands from a long, long time ago.
These people didn't know what they were doing, and thus, they were devoured by their own creations, which soon spread across the world, the almost demonic varmints laying dormant for long, long periods of time in between they're grotesque feedings, with these feedings being gluttonous, brutal, swift and vicious.
As such, unlike other critters who are harmonious with the land, and are cooperative in an ecosystem, the Monsquitoes are a terror, a blight, And dare I say, a scourge on the land And whatever domain they encroach upon.
So Coyote and Badger, knowing the danger that these critters posed to the land, and seeing Bill quickly become a brave and clever warrior, decided that Bill's first big mission as a guardian of the lands would be to deal with the Monsquitoes.
Of course Bill, having a great amount of ego, confidence, excitement, and enthusiasm for his first real mission, accepted this task without a second thought, and was off on his hunt for the swarm, confident that this task would be a cakewalk.
It was not a cakewalk.
So after a day or so of searching, Bill had found the swarm, Its numbers being so high to blot out the sun as they flew above the prairies, but this did not deter Bill as he was ready to initiate his first plan of attack.
This plan of attack being, of course, running at the swarm head on screaming a war cry as he challenged them nasty critters with only his brute strength, "surely" Bill thought "these glorified butterflies would be nothing but bug paste against my fists of iron and awesome might".
Of course this plan, let's say to be nice, just didn't work out, there were too many of the critters and not enough of Bill, and for every 5 bugs Bill was able to punch with one hefty swing, 35 more would end up piercing his skin with them steel suckers.
So quickly, Bill packed his metaphorical tail between his legs, and bolted out of there at the speed of light, and when he found cover and the adrenaline wore off, he found himself in quite a bit of agonizing pain.
He looked at his body and found himself covered from the top of his head to the tips of his toes in large, lumpy bite marks that were intensely sore and still leaking.
Despite this setback, Bill was not deterred, he was stubborn and knew the kind of havoc these things could bring, especially having just been at the receiving end of their painful power, he couldn't allow these critters to hurt the land he had grown up on, and his family that still lived on that land, so Bill went back to the drawing board and came up with a new plan.
Bill began fashioning some rope out of some fibrous plants he was able to find, and he then found some nicely sized and shaped rocks, and using the rope he made, he tied rocks onto his body, from the top of his head, to the tips of his toes.
Creating a sort of makeshift caveman like armor, but after this he was left with some unused rocks and rope, quickly though, he got creative, and thinking about how cool it'd be, he turned them leftovers into a makeshift flail like weapon.
He then, In a stroke of pure stubborn stupidity, basically repeated his first plan, running in, fists raised, screaming at the top of his lungs a war cry, but this time, with a protective shell and a badass weapon, Bill would be safe and adequately armed to deal with the threat.
Right?
Unfortunately the sang "second verse same as the first" proved to be very apt to describe this situation, although maybe this "second verse" might have been just a tad bit worse.
As Bill was not only still pierced repeatedly by them nasty critters, he would also end up hitting himself repeatedly with the poorly thought out rock flail, which he had no idea how to use effectively and just thought looked cool, and that by using it, it would make him look more "badass".
So Bill again was sent packing by the beasts and felt absolutely, fundamentally, humiliated and worthless.
Bill: How could these damn bugs overwhelm and beat me, the mighty Pecos Bill, maybe I ain't so mighty after all, maybe all of that praise was just courtesy from Mamog and Papog, maybe I ain't as great as I thought, I done failed all my family, friends, everyone, they're all gonna die, and it's all my fault.
Bill pouted, even beginning to cry as he fell into quite the dark place, but during this frustration driven, mental self deconstruction, Bill remembered something Coyote had told him.
Coyote: Where brute force may fail, cleverness shall prevail.
He also remembered something Mama Badger said.
Badger: Those who only follow the rule of cool, tend to be the types who drool, also if anyone ever talks shit about you, and makes you feel bad, I'll impale them on a cactus, and if you start doing it to yourself, I'll make that part of you a different person and do it to them.
That last part made Bill giggle, and now he really remembered, he wasn't just some mindless marauder or fists with a body attached, He also done got a head with quite the brain in it that he was not using to its fullest, He was sacrificing his clever mind for the sake of looking badass and solving the problem purely with his strength, letting his machismo driven ego take the reins which done made a fool out of him.
Even when a bit of his cleverness was able to peak out from behind his massive ego, this being his second plan with him thinking and making body armor, that ego of his made him not think the whole plan through, and ended up with him making unnecessary things that just looked cool, and running in half cocked.
That's how he ended up repeatedly and accidentally bludgeoning his balls with a rock on a rope as a bunch of giant mosquitoes sucked out his blood from almost every angle.
So Bill got to thinking, and plotting, and scheming, he switched up the perspective and how he was looking at the situation, and soon, began gathering materials and finding what he needed.
He found the narrowest, thinnest and straightest canyon he could find, then he grabbed the stone flail from his last attempt to fight the Monsquitos, and then found himself a nice tree, soon fashioning himself a bow and one arrow from the tree and former flail, and placed the bow and arrow at the end of that narrow canyon.
Then, he found the Monsquitoes, and enacted his genius plan.
As the swarm flew around in the air, all the critters buzzing about, sniffing the air, trying to figure out the right direction to go for their next meal, it soon collectively noticed a loud thing on the ground.
It was none other than Bill, in his birthday suit, running about hooting and a hollerin his war cry, holding his fists in the air like he had done before, in other words, he was acting like a loud, overly macho, idiot.
The Monsquitoes seeing such a site, saw only a defenseless meal that was practically, no, literally asking for it, it was irresistible and they, With literally no hesitation, started a dive towards their prey, practically putting on bibs as they prepared to dine.
Exactly what Bill wanted them to do.
So Bill bolted, not so fast that he would immediately lose the critters, like he had twice before, but just fast enough so they couldn't catch him and would be enticed to chase.
Keeping this pace, he quickly and steadily led those nasty varmints to the canyon he had found, and Bill got to where he left his bow, grabbed it, aimed it, waited a moment for all the Monsquitos to be in sight, and fired it.
All 100,001 Monsquitoes were downed with one arrow, in almost an instant, as the arrow hurdled through the air like a lightning bolt, the critters didn't know what hit em.
So Bill, fully realizing what he had just done, quickly celebrated, said a prayer, and collected up every last one of them varmints, and took them back to Badger and Coyote, who were impressed and proud of what their boy had accomplished.
Not more than a day after this, a celebration was held, with all the critters of the land and sky coming to congratulate their nephew for his victory, and partake in the feast of Monsquitos.
Surprisingly the blood suckers tasted quite good when barbecued, and would probably be considered something like lobsters of the land to our modern taste buds, I've also heard they tasted like chicken but with an exoskeleton.
Anyways, that's all besides the point, where was I.
Oh yeah.
So Bill's Mamog and Papog had prepared gifts as a reward for their boy's hard work.
Badger had taken the nasty suckers that could pierce through just about anything from the Monsquitoes, fashioning each one of them into sucker arrows for her boy, and Coyote, taking the bow and original arrow his boy crafted, enchanted them, the bow became unbreakable, and the arrow, well now that one arrow could track a target.
So now with these sucker arrows, Bill could shoot them at practically any target and have the arrows pierce right through, and then, if'en that target has fluids inside it, the arrow will automatically begin sucking those fluids out, like a tap.
He also now had a special arrow that could home in on practically any target Bill could think of.
This all on top of the bow he would be shooting with being practically indestructible.
Needless to say, this whole experience was a learning one for Bill, Bill having been tremendously humbled and greatly educated by it, and the gifts he got after all was said and done, he was indescribably thankful for each one, preceding to give his parents one of his famous, back cracking bear hugs as thanks.
So ends the story of Bill vs the Monsquitos.
(Authors/scribe's note: this chapter is pretty straightforward, one with a relatable lesson and struggle for Pecos and the first of many Pecos vs blank stories,
Pecos's struggle twords the middle with feeling useless and stuff is something I personally find quite relatable, and it wouldn't surprise me if this part was added by my mom to give me a personal hero that struggled somewhat similar to how I struggled, with feeling worthless and like a big old fool,
But Bill works through it, is clever and finds a solution,
Anyways, I think that's all I got to say on this chapter, next chapter we get introduced to a character integral to Bill's mythos)
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